How to Get Your Partner in the Mood

Sex is essential to a healthy marriage. Most surveys show that men want sex far more often than women, but this isn’t always the case. Men want sex more than women. It doesn’t work that way, though. Sex alone isn’t enough to make someone feel close. We want to build a strong relationship with our wives based on our commitment and love, not just on physical touches, like when we hug each other. But are there ways to make your wife want to be with you without having to touch her?

Many of us have faced challenges getting our partners in the mood, especially when our schedules are jam-packed with events and commitments. But, regardless of how busy we are, we must show our partner that we care by being purposeful and flirtatious. 

But are there ways to make your wife want to be with you without having to touch her?

Continue reading if you or your partner are looking for some new ways to get in the mood.


Understand that this is not a one-sided relationship:

The word “connection” is crucial in a marriage. “her” is the most critical word in sex, not “me.” Look at sexuality from her perspective and see it as an expression of what she likes. Giving her what she desires truly brings pleasure.

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Take the pressure off of her mind.

With so much on their minds, women find it difficult to get in the mood, much less enjoy sex, nearly impossible. And frequently, those million things are jobs that need to be finished, housekeeping that needs to be done, or things that she must remember for the next day. Sometimes it’s because she’s had poor interactions with friends or family or because she feels like a specific aspect of her life is out of kilt.

Assist her in completing the chores first and foremost. Contribute to the cause. Assist her with chores throughout the day so she doesn’t have quite as much to do at night.

However, assist her in processing those feelings as well. Some women require alone time to process–make it a practice to provide her time to go running, take a bath, or journal. Then, when she’s completed that, inquire about it. “Is there anything on your mind that I can assist you in sorting?” Certain women require the ability to rationalize everything. Therefore, take a walk after supper and listen to what she has to say.

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Give her intimacy without expecting sex in return.

Great sex is not transactional; it is relational.  Even when her hormones say, “I’m not interested,” being present anyway says, “I love you.” So put your partner’s needs ahead of your own. 

Take a mental stroll down memory lane. If you’d like some sexy bedroom inspiration, take a peek into your own archives. Recall a particularly hot sex romp or even come up with a new sexual fantasy. Your imagination is full of sexy surprises.

Lotion up. This one’s for you and your partner. After slipping out of the shower, ask your man to join you in the bathroom. Have him rub lotion on your lower half—your legs and maybe even butt cheeks—while you focus on your upper body. The slick feeling of skin on skin will have both of you feeling hot-to-trot before the lotion even has a chance to soak in!

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